My wife and I took the kids out to eat last night to surprise them with a little fun, and to take a break from making dinner and doing dishes. We got to the restaurant early and were nearly the only people in our section. Within minutes, the kids were tearing apart napkins, biting crayons, dropping jelly packets on the floor and generally enjoying themselves. I had settled in my chair with a cup of coffee and was delighted by the relative relaxation of a quiet restaurant and no cleanup after.
Then we heard it. A deep, disturbing cough. Every few minutes we’d hear it again. I discreetly turned towards the sound and saw a rather haggard looking older gentleman sitting alone. The others in our section definitely noticed the cough and tried not to be visibly offended. I made a comment to my wife that the noise might take all the enjoyment out of the experience. She just smiled and said I was being a bit too dramatic.
We ordered, ate, and were loitering at our table for a bit. The coughing happened intermittently throughout the meal, but the man left just before we were done eating. The waitress came up and said, “You’re all set.” We looked up a little confused. She added, “The gentleman over there paid for your meal.” My wife asked if she was referring to the older guy who had been coughing and she said yes. She told us he comes in nearly every day, and, “Sometimes he just picks up somebodies check”. I was incredibly humbled.
What I saw as an impediment to an enjoyable family dinner become an implement. Not only did this stranger save us a little money, his act completely transformed the whole experience. My wife was glowing, the kids thought it was the coolest thing ever, and I was reminded of how short-sighted I can be. My position regarding this guest began as an adversarial one. I heard his cough and immediately set myself up against him mentally. I was fighting for an enjoyable experience, and he was trying to prevent it. When the waitress delivered the news, it shattered my whole narrative and made me feel small.
If we look for roadblocks, we’ll find them. If we suspend judgement and let things unfold, roadblocks may turn into opportunities.